Dark Skin Woman Only Approached by Other Races

Well, I have to say, I truly believe after I posted that question asking black men their complaints of the black woman and causing such an uproar, that Facebook page began opening up to more questions such as this, in a more respectful manner. 

This week a dark skin black woman asked everyone what was going on, why were the men in her own races over looking her?

Well, they answered sensibly and respectfully.  Well...the majority of them.  To sum it up, some thought maybe it was her fault that she was sending out some vibe that made men go away from her.  In this case, the poster responded back to everyone's answers even though she could have stayed anonymous.  To 200 responses she finally said that she would work on her vibe and start to approach black men instead of waiting for them.

Now that's out of the way, one man said he had to confess that he only liked red-boned women.  For those of you not familiar with this kind of talk, we black folks have what is called racism against our own race which some pointed out on the post that no other race exhibits. 

A few of the answers attributed this racism to the "field" and the "house" negro syndrome during slavery time.  Another said that there could be other issues but realized the fact that "don't discount the fact that her skin tone isn't one of them.  Black-on-black prejudice is real." Aman. 

Another said that it goes the other way; that some light skin sisters get rejected because men prefer dark skin women.  Another girl said of a prejudice she gets that "Other races would always tell me how beautiful I was. Black men would usually add "for a dark skin girl" after saying it, as if dark skin is associated with ugly." 

Then you had the ones said "You might not be attractive".  Ha, ha, ha, that's messed up.  Another said that she didn't think that men discriminated when it came to skin tone. Umm...I'll leave that alone.
Then that one comment that 'yet another post belittling  black people.  Umm, I'm sorry, but sensitivity to a problem when it comes up and people are discussing it never solves the issue...talking about it does. 

What about the field of psychiatry, how in the world would it even be a business if no one talked about their problems?  Most of the time, there is no solution given, but the fact that the person in need of counseling could get out their concerns was a healing process unto itself.

Whatever the case may be, I have to admit that growing up myself majorly living in the white society where I was the only black 99% of the time.  I feared getting any sunlight or thought of my skin becoming dark that I used sunblock with the SPF of 70 and above.  It worked to keep me lightskin.  Now, I have released from this that I go in the opposite direction and actually get tans and focus on loving the skin that was given to me. 

I do have to say that when I was light skinned and when I would become a dark, dark color, I definitely saw a difference.  At one time I used to fundraise for my church and the days that I had become very, very dark I noticed a huge difference, a considerable difference in the people's first reaction.  Went from trust to fear when I approached them compare to my 'lighter' days. 

Not my imagination and take it however, but I'm old enough and experienced all races and communities to know that her question is valid.  This post was on Sunday so I thought I would incorporate this into the story.  I thought the wild friend twice divorced could have this problem maybe. 

Why this topic?  Because my Elizabeth character only is attracted to white men and diss the brothers.

I haven't been writing much because I have been mostly subconsciously reworking the story in my mind to see the bigger picture to see that spirit world my characters are living in that is real to them and make it real to me.

I do have to say that as I back off of the physical writing, writers will relate to this, my subconscious and my regular thinking is working hard.  So, when you read the 9-page epilogue on the dashboard above, you can say bye, bye to the dry rhetoric as now I found Giselle's writing voice for it to spruce it up and adding to the story of her history of why she is not married. 

This is the main reason I have not been able to write, I know Giselle, I am Giselle, but putting it on paper (slices throat).  If I or any other creative person on earth could somehow transfer what is churning into our minds and place it into the world unhinged, you would see less crazy, drug-dependent, crazy, did I say crazy artists out there!

I am still not ready to post the seven pages where we get to see Mr. Washington, I will wait 'till the page gets more views, and they are coming so I appreciate you viewing these updates every week, it's inspiring me to keep going.

I like to give a shout out to the TwitterFam visiting here, you all keep me going and I promise the book will be worth it and you can say you were there as the book found its voice.  Let's make history.  Everyone else if you want to follow me on twitter I am at, twitter.com/iamdenisemorris.

Have a lovely weekend and week and see you here again next Saturday! 

Love and Harmony People,
Denise Rochelle M.

Update: Black Men, What is Your #1 Complaint of Black Women?

Welcome back!  Well, a couple of posts ago I mentioned that I would be hearing from a forum after I asked a question.  It took two weeks, so I posted the question twice. 

The first post was stating my purpose for asking the question "Black men what is your biggest complaint against black women." and then I thought recently it wouldn't post, so I reposted a shorter question asking both black men and women what were their grievances about the other side.

Of course, you know why I asked because I deal with the issues and problems of black men and women in the dating pool in My Black Pride.





I thought I would post some of the comments here, but let's just say, Wow, I as poster was even attacked for asking such a question.  It was a very heated debate.  Men were so happy for the opportunity for an open ear and loved that a female was asking the question.  Then there were other people of other races chiming in that they felt left out, then you had the ones that were over accommodating for the negative question by saying how wonderful black men and women were, they had no complaints and they didn't want to add to the negativity. 

Even one poster after several men and women on either posts listed their grievances and even shot off onto one another because of their answers point blank said, "Now this is why all the other races don't like ya'll.  You always putting each other down."

Well, the grievances were long and valid.  One was directed at me, posters are anonymous by default, to why don't I offer a solution.

And there we go.  I feel finally there is the point!  Exactly.  My time is not wasted on this story venture after all.  Another person had said that the grievances were no different between the races, but unfortunately this is not true.  Unlike all of the other races, black Americans have a deep scar when it comes to the interaction of the black male and the black female that is to this moment being swept under the rug.  There are of course problems similar in other communities, but when certain problems arise that are ingrained into that community cloaked over those people, there must be a beginning source to that problem.

Other communities, there is not a common tie to men/women issues as much as the black issues.  We have one common tie that began it all.  DON'T get mad at me for making excuses, because these aren't excuses.  Take a deep look, the black community never overcame slavery, were taught by their slave ancestors and some are still raising and living MENTALLY like their slave grand, grand etc. how can you be any different if the chain is not broken?

I have been released from that chain and through Black Pride I feel it's a great forum to open up that wound, pierce through it and cleanse it.  Like a mission of sorts.

Who can deny that black men were encouraged just over a century ago to be strong only, bare children even outside of wedlock, and leave those children. Many did not raise their families and were sold to other ranches like cattle to bare more children with multiple women.  On the other hand, the black woman was to be strong on her own and take care of every single child in the household including her own and cater to a man that was her 'boss' called the master. 

I had written a post back on that forum with a little anger that people were mad I asked the question stirring up trouble and posed this answer, but I think that question has been dropped.  Too much heat.

Bad for the forum, good for My Black Pride and Prejudice book. I  actually have to go back to the original post and see the answers and incorporate them.

This week's writing was mainly filling in holes in my story and fleshing out the story of Giselle having to change positions from the original Pride and Prejudice where Mr. Darcy came to her twice not including the letter scene explaining his defenses, and changed it to Giselle having to approach Mr. Washington with all of her pride gone and open the door for him to come to her once more.  So there are a few additional scenes I added for this occasion.

Well, the topic of black men and women disrespect for one another was so evident on the posts I have to search for it and see the bigger picture.  It was actually two people on either post that stated I needed to give a solution.  Isn't that like a sign from God? 

What solution do I offer in Black Pride?  The same as the original book gave, get rid of pride and fear and respect one another.  Except both characters in my version have to go through life changing moments to change their bad habits and let go to come together the second time around as one couple.

That's all for this week.  I don't like to 'stir up no trouble', ha, ha but sometimes, to make change, someone has to go into the kitchen and mix it up a little bit.  And I am the perfect person for stirring up the pot!  See you next Saturday!

Love and Unity,
Denise Rochelle M.

Good and Prosperous Morning to all.  I actually was productive the total week.  As matters change in my life in relation to my Elizabeth character, Giselle, I have just sat back and played the spirit world of my version of Pride and Prejudice in my mind as an outsider. There aren't MAJOR changes, but some that will definitely make some P &P lovers heart skip a beat from not sticking too closely to the original.
Without giving away too much, well, just a little. 

For those who aren't as familiar with Pride and Prejudice, the main character is a strong English woman who has of course as the title a lot of pride and refuses to let anyone into her world especially men.  To me it seems everything about Mr. Darcy in appearance alone just made her angry. 

He was rich, he was good looking, he was arrogant etc. and she was against what she prejudiced him to be by appearance alone.  But in the Jane Austen version, Mr. Darcy gets rid of all of these character flaws to get closer to Elizabeth and pursues her twice after being rejected.  And through Mr. Darcy softening his heart, Jane changes her pride and accepts the one man she said she would never love.

Okay, with all of that said.  My story refuses for me to let Giselle, Elizabeth's bitter twin, off the hook.  I have added several scenes where Giselle struggles with her pride to let Mr. Washington (Mr. Darcy) know how she feels.  In fact, her father tells her that she already rejected him and unless she opens the door wide for him to know that he will not be rejected a second time, he would never walk through.  So sort of a spoiler, Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy switch positions after her rejection where we focus more on Elizabeth trying to approach Mr. Darcy to open his heart.

So, the past few days I let Mr. Washington back off from Giselle and make her struggle with her own
character issues.  Jane Austen is awesome, but she made it too easy for Jane to accept him the second time without too much struggle for her own character to change.  I believe because I am telling it from a black experience point of view where there is hundreds of years of deep seated hatred between black men and women dealing with their pride, I made these changes.

I am again satisfied with my revisions.  I will be focusing from now on reading my story as if I have never seen it before.  I will be tweaking along the way, not trying to write grammatically correct yet or speak in high society manner.  I will leave all the little details for my final edit next month.
Because I see more the people visiting starting to pick up, be prepared to get a seven page blurb of Black Pride in the coming weeks.  Not soon though, I'm protective of my baby.  It is the very first scene we all get to see Mr. Darcy.  Yes, that one at the party.

Well, this is it for now.  I will see you Wednesday or next year btw. Cheers and Happy everything else.

Love,
Denise Rochelle M.

Pride and Prejudice Update: Ending Change

Wow, the holidays was less about gifts and 90% about the people in my life all across the world.  I actually might be growing up.  I was able to do a little writing.  I believe the literature is a living entity once it is placed on paper or in object outside of our minds, and there is so much I would like to have accomplished with my comedy rewrite by now, but ...  I was able to add and tweak only two scenes since Saturday.

My routine is I think of the story visually as scenes and feel which ones need it the most that day.  This time, I thought that the ending to Pride and Prejudice, yes, the lovely scene after Mr. Darcy's aunt comes and chews the heck out of Elizabeth and then Mr. Darcy comes to apologize to her.  That one.  The other scene is not in the original book, but is my Elizabeth character Giselle's epilogue which I posted, and is only the first layer and will go through two layers before the final release.

Let's first start with the ending.  I found strongly, that the way P and P ends for Jane Austen is beautiful and I ended it that way ... but the spirit of my book and the fact that my Giselle character is a strong black woman with strong prejudice against black men and strong pride to let love in, the story screamed to change it.  I won't reveal more, but the flow of this version, I guarantee that there will be some gripes with the change, but it is ingrained into my character's world.

That's another thing I found out recently that hundreds of screenwriting books and few classes and my screenwriting group never could drill in my head.

Every story creates a living reality, a spirit world of its own that as you read that story, you become part of that world.  If the writer is able to tap into their character's spirit and world it becomes a classic, because their world lives infinitely.  Jane Austen was able to do this.  Luckily, her character's spirit are easy to grasp like no characters ever before.

Secondly, I saw that my epilogue needs to set up a lot of changes that you P and P lovers will encounter.  First of all my character has a past, but she has let go of her baggage.  Secondly, she has dated before, where Elizabeth never dated or had a boyfriend.  I added references to how she became strong and too prideful to show her feelings toward men or let her heart be open so when Mr. Washington does all these things by being exactly opposite of her prejudices, it has more meaning.

So, I still have a lot more tweaks to do by Saturday concerning these same aspects.  I will let the comedy flow through from now one wherever as I don't see where else to put it for now.  So, as a writer, I am very satisfied where my story is right now. VERY.

Plus, I no longer feel guilty about my story not allowing me near it until my heart is straight.  Now, after a week off, I have a fresher understand of Giselle and her world when I started to read the story pieces after staying away from it.  Writers should be at peace with not always working for THAT particular project every single day.  Rest the eyes, stay silent and it will come, and like love you will have a higher appreciation for it once you resume.  I have rested a total of three weeks on Black Pride whereas other stories I worked on for years everyday trying to hammer out the problems.  I have never been this far along and unworried about my story world before after only two months of it coming to me.

Watch out world, another Pride and Prejudice redux is coming.

I love you sincerely across the globe,

Have sanctity in your words,

Love,
Denise Rochelle M.