Entertainment: Where Are the High-Standard Women?

Sounds like an insult, but coming from a woman it might sound like a challenge or a wake up call.  Yes, women still wear dresses and are cordial when need be, but it has become acceptable for even people in high positions to speak laid back, broken English in real life.  Where's the class?

We can instantly debate that the state of women today wanting so much equality even in the way we dress is more evident when we compare ourselves to the women of the 1800s.

No better way to delve into that world than through the books of Jane Austen and her womenfolk in relation to writing about that time. With the advent of reality television, the screaming, loud most vocal woman gets all of the attention.

You know who I'm talking about.  The woman who is wildly dressed, has no manners, is singled out by the rest of the cast of characters as the 'B' title she wears like the Scarlet Letter.  Women don't have to wear dresses to be considered the Yin type of woman, but the whole equality thing since the 70s has degraded our woman-likeness to some degree.

This trend of the female 'strong' woman who can handle everything under the sun like a man has dominated our culture so much, the 'B' word is showing up in books and movies as the average woman now.  Something we should aim to be and dress like to obtain the man or the job at the end of the story.  As a writer, I can place my complaint in the complaint box with any female leads that I write.

Where did the Yin-type woman in the media go?

Pretty Woman took half the movie to transition the smart-talking harlot into a fantabulous lady, but still, that was 20 years ago!  This movie was derived from an even older movie -My Fair Lady - about a street culturally reckless woman trained to match the savvy talk of the rich and famous in England.

Is it old fashion to want to be praised for being womanlike again - to want to stop seeing the 'B' get praised for her wild mouth and ways?

Do we all want to be walking around in a thousands years with our knuckles to the ground saying at least we are equal?

There is nothing like a woman on earth.  God mad the mountains, the stars, the creation based on His idea FIRST of a man and woman.  Mountains look like breasts!  The woman should celebrate her body with clothing that flows around every corner in recognition that we were not meant to be equal in every way.

Why is the movie "Breakfast at Tiffany's" such a classic?

I believe because first Holly Golightly had built the facade of a sophisticated woman who had a heart and secondly, she wore classy clothes that can be envied to this day.  No one can out do Audrey Hepburn as that character who still can take people's hearts.  People who knew her off screen said she was not acting, she was a true lady in style and in speak.

Is it wrong to celebrate equality and yet still possibly celebrate every curve and classy ways only a woman on earth can possess?
I'm not too fond of the clothing line Michelle Obama wears, a little too plain, but she is the example of a modern POWERFUL person owning her womanhood.  She gives an example that she can be strong to her nation, ladylike and support her husband and be a mother at the same time.  She won the golden ticket at the end of the movie with class.

Pride and Prejudice is the ultimate book of Yin women except Elizabeth.  All of the adaptions, except the 1970s television version which I think made Elizabeth a little too soft, portray Elizabeth as strong and leveled headed.

She was the type that didn't care if she had messy hair or whether mud was on the end of her elegant dress.  To her, all of the necessary things to be a woman in that day she wore as requirement, and let her rough personality overshine.  Yet, she had the eyes of many Alpha-type men in love with her.  Who is more Alpha than Mr. Darcy?!

Why?

By observing the spirit of the character, I can see that Elizabeth's tough exterior and speak coupled with sincerity made her a beautiful woman.

Remember how Mr. Darcy went from 'she's plain' to defending her to his friends after she left the mansion with her messy hair and the girls were making fun of her?  He said he thought her plain before, but was wrong, she was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen.

I think integrity is missing in not only women in the movies who are stealing boyfriends, making fun of people behind the back, but also in life as we try to keep up with our male counterparts in the race for life.

A woman is truly the bedrock of the family.

What true man is going to make all of the decisions in the house without consulting his wife first.  A successful man can make all the plans and decisions he wants, but I bet Michelle will give the final word when it comes to the personal affairs of the Obama household.

Have you heard of the story where Michelle and Barrack went to a restaurant and she found out that she used to date the owner?

Barrack said that she could have been the wife of a restaurant owner and she said, no, she would have been the wife of the President that used to own a restaurant.

This is so poignant.

Women run the country through the way they raise their children and their husbands!  We not only carry all of humanity for 9 months, we raise them as well.  I don't have to see the Leave It To Beaver mother-type washing clothes, cooking and taking care of the house all day, but I want to see women who actually stand for something again.

Get rid of these wimpy characters, drama, sleep with many people no center or guidance just step over anyone say anything just to get what you want kind of girl.  Maybe once women in films, books and movies find their center, then the media can start entertaining us with quality movies once again.

Oh, well, I suppose the rant is over.  Now, let's go watch an 80's romantic comedy or better yet, the 2005 version of Pride and Prejudice.  See you next Saturday...have a great weekend, everybody!

Denise Rochelle M.

Update: Black Men, What is Your #1 Complaint of Black Women?

Welcome back!  Well, a couple of posts ago I mentioned that I would be hearing from a forum after I asked a question.  It took two weeks, so I posted the question twice. 

The first post was stating my purpose for asking the question "Black men what is your biggest complaint against black women." and then I thought recently it wouldn't post, so I reposted a shorter question asking both black men and women what were their grievances about the other side.

Of course, you know why I asked because I deal with the issues and problems of black men and women in the dating pool in My Black Pride.





I thought I would post some of the comments here, but let's just say, Wow, I as poster was even attacked for asking such a question.  It was a very heated debate.  Men were so happy for the opportunity for an open ear and loved that a female was asking the question.  Then there were other people of other races chiming in that they felt left out, then you had the ones that were over accommodating for the negative question by saying how wonderful black men and women were, they had no complaints and they didn't want to add to the negativity. 

Even one poster after several men and women on either posts listed their grievances and even shot off onto one another because of their answers point blank said, "Now this is why all the other races don't like ya'll.  You always putting each other down."

Well, the grievances were long and valid.  One was directed at me, posters are anonymous by default, to why don't I offer a solution.

And there we go.  I feel finally there is the point!  Exactly.  My time is not wasted on this story venture after all.  Another person had said that the grievances were no different between the races, but unfortunately this is not true.  Unlike all of the other races, black Americans have a deep scar when it comes to the interaction of the black male and the black female that is to this moment being swept under the rug.  There are of course problems similar in other communities, but when certain problems arise that are ingrained into that community cloaked over those people, there must be a beginning source to that problem.

Other communities, there is not a common tie to men/women issues as much as the black issues.  We have one common tie that began it all.  DON'T get mad at me for making excuses, because these aren't excuses.  Take a deep look, the black community never overcame slavery, were taught by their slave ancestors and some are still raising and living MENTALLY like their slave grand, grand etc. how can you be any different if the chain is not broken?

I have been released from that chain and through Black Pride I feel it's a great forum to open up that wound, pierce through it and cleanse it.  Like a mission of sorts.

Who can deny that black men were encouraged just over a century ago to be strong only, bare children even outside of wedlock, and leave those children. Many did not raise their families and were sold to other ranches like cattle to bare more children with multiple women.  On the other hand, the black woman was to be strong on her own and take care of every single child in the household including her own and cater to a man that was her 'boss' called the master. 

I had written a post back on that forum with a little anger that people were mad I asked the question stirring up trouble and posed this answer, but I think that question has been dropped.  Too much heat.

Bad for the forum, good for My Black Pride and Prejudice book. I  actually have to go back to the original post and see the answers and incorporate them.

This week's writing was mainly filling in holes in my story and fleshing out the story of Giselle having to change positions from the original Pride and Prejudice where Mr. Darcy came to her twice not including the letter scene explaining his defenses, and changed it to Giselle having to approach Mr. Washington with all of her pride gone and open the door for him to come to her once more.  So there are a few additional scenes I added for this occasion.

Well, the topic of black men and women disrespect for one another was so evident on the posts I have to search for it and see the bigger picture.  It was actually two people on either post that stated I needed to give a solution.  Isn't that like a sign from God? 

What solution do I offer in Black Pride?  The same as the original book gave, get rid of pride and fear and respect one another.  Except both characters in my version have to go through life changing moments to change their bad habits and let go to come together the second time around as one couple.

That's all for this week.  I don't like to 'stir up no trouble', ha, ha but sometimes, to make change, someone has to go into the kitchen and mix it up a little bit.  And I am the perfect person for stirring up the pot!  See you next Saturday!

Love and Unity,
Denise Rochelle M.

Update: Black Women, We Need to Chill

Happy, Happy Wednesday or in the industry Hump Day. 

For clarification, I am a reformed man hater and found this type of black woman, including my mother, made me think this way at one time. Then I look and see how they chewed up their men and try to give me advice and thought ... you are WRONG. 

How is it I would have tens of cool men friends yet when it came to my past dating I viewed them as evil?  When actually, I never had been treated wrongly, EVER, by a black man.  I've been wooed just like in the movies with flowers, sweet words and I was the one screaming at them.  Black women just kept telling me black men were nothing, they lie, cheat etc.  Yes, maybe to THEM, but by being friends first this never happened or it ended before it got to that point.  And the one guy who did cheat I asked him and he told me straight yes, but he was still in high school and I was a cougar at 23!  Ha, ha.

Sisters, this is wrong.  You bring on what comes to you, change the mindset.  I would love to represent this more in my book and any black men complaints.  After living with my mother and see how she can bring even my docile fun attitude to the brinks of hell, my thinking changed.  Men aren't evil, we bring it out of them, Sisters.  I think men are beautiful creatures like children and their attitude is just a mirror of your own.  Anyway, I will be focusing more on this in the novel and think it needs to be addressed and end in black society.

How was my writing this week?  One word.  Exactly.  That is all that I was able to write for my story this week since Saturday.  One aspect of creativity I found out, it is a living entity once you apply it to a substantial plane like paper or material.  It does NOT want to be touched if your Spirit or Mind is not giving it its 100 percent attention as I was not giving Pride and Prejudice this last few days. 

But, I have finally had a conversation with a person off line that I could have good give and take about this idea and they can't wait to read it because they think this is a great idea.  Can you believe in over a month this is the first feedback I get? 

Where does my energy come from to pursue this venture?  She loves P&P and thinks having it told from the high black society side hasn't been done and will be awesome.  I needed that encouragemental shot!  Anyway.  I am waiting for all the responses from one forum where I asked the men all of their complaints of black women because I think it is lacking in this story.  Besides, I think black men catch enough slack on the big screen, time they get represented and show the black  female side is actually deserving of their wrath sometimes. 

It looks like I will have my first real draft as planned by the end of December but want to take another month to clean up the details and final edit before I self-publish a few copies and send them out to readers for their feedback. 

I found this is the best way. I  did that for my "Last Cottonpicker" story, to which I moved back to the countryside to write.  The feedback on that story was it was a beautiful rich story, but it had no focus.  Now, recently with the heavens opening and giving divine inspiration, even that story has become more clear to me. 

Anyway, I will return Saturday, but it doesn't look like I will be writing so much, and I learned not to force it either.

Have a good one and thanks for checking back.

BLACK GENTLEMEN Do you have any grievances that you would like for me to put in the book of the number one annoying thing black women do that you must have added to the story?

Love and Peace,
Denise Morris